And then there were 2…
Our Daisy Chain blogger Charlotte Leaman is a part-time freelance fashion merchant and full-time mum. Here, she gives an honest account of the immediate aftermath when her family of three became four!
So after spending nine months getting larger by the day and seriously struggling to keep up with my two-year-old Monty, baby number two – Rufus – arrived five days early! All of a sudden my love doubled and life became a whole new adventure…
I think everyone with a child has some idea about what it’s going to be like with two. After all, you’ve already gone through all the milestones and emotions that come with becoming a parent for the first time. But I don’t think anything really prepares you for how life change with two little ones!
Friends with two children gave me lots of advice, and I listened and took it in, and thought ‘Okay, yes! I’ll be ok with this!’ Then reality hit home, and I was in a whole new world, juggling everything and trying to figure out how to get dressed let alone have a shower!
Then there’s the guilt of not giving your eldest your undivided attention, that really kicks in big time.
Thankfully, Monty has taken to Rufus really well, and it melts my heart. But he has his moments, not really understanding why I’m always carrying baby Rufey around! He often says ‘Mummy, put that baby back in the pram now!’
With Monty, I had a pretty horrid labour, which ended up in an emergency cesarean section. Recovery was long, and I was adamant that if I would avoid another C-section with number two.
With Rufus, labour was hard and long, but… I managed to avoid the section! Whoop! But what I didn’t avoid, or even really consider was the post Vbac mess I was in afterwards! Wow. The episiotomy, the stitches, the swelling… I wasn’t prepared for how sore and hard the first week of healing would be!
I couldn’t sit down, I could hardly walk, my milk came in and I had the biggest, sorest boobs, and on it went! Add into the mix the total lack of sleep, and still having to function in the morning when Monty woke up for the day!
I felt completely out of control. I was emotional and felt guilty that I was being a useless mum to my two-year-old! I kept thinking ‘Why have I done this?!’ I should have just had a C-section, but as my lovely big sister kept saying to me ‘You will feel like a different person in a week, I promise you!’ And boy was she right!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still healing, but now it’s manageable and feel like I’m slowing getting myself back!
So now it’s onto life with two, and solo parenting Monday- Friday as Daddy goes back to work. As ever, normal life resumes. I won’t lie, I’m bricking it, but I’m sure we will find a rhythm that works for us – and as long as there are mountains of coffee to ride along with, I’ll give it my best shot!
Wish me luck! I’ll report back soon.